*Remixed* Act Like A Man, Think Like a Lady

Nobody told me today was Opposite Day! 

Editor's Note: A year ago I wrote something similar to this for the ladies. Check it out. 


Dating. The thing all single people hate but accept as a necessary evil. 
Pop Quiz: Which kind of first date is the least irksome? 
A) Dinner & a movie dates. 
B) Beach dates. 
C) Come over and chill dates. 
D) All of the above are annoying AF. 
The correct answer is D. All kinds of dates are annoying. 


Women complicate things. Women are emotional. We all know these things to be true. Don't try to debate me on this. You will lose. Men have the great ability to keep the most complicated situations simple. No this is not a post about penis envy but I admire men and their ability to keep things simple. Beyonce sang a song about what she would do if she were a boy. Ciara did the same. Steve Harvey built a relationship advice empire laid with a "Think like a man" foundation. 


If women could master flipping a situation 101, straddling, and crying at the drop of a hat we could assume our rightful place as rulers of the free world. Inception.


Today its about the fellas. We've had enough of people telling us to act like y'all. Its your turn. Act like a Man, Think Like a Lady. 
Pull up a chair. Kiss the rang.

1. Realize Disney Sold Us Fairytale Dreams. Disney has all regular chicks thinkin they're a Princess. The entire Disney empire is built on that BS they sell little girls. We want our Prince Charming- a man exactly our type who will confess his undying love and protect us forever. That fairytale doesn't work if Prince Charming is too scared to approach us. Rejection is a valid fear to have but I'm gonna need you all to grab your nuts and go after the woman you really want. Don't just go for the woman who goes for you. Don't go overboard by being overly aggressive and demanding dates. Give her the green light. Let her know you're single and interested. Take the guessing out of it. Oh, and don't ignore obvious signs she isn't interested.  


2. Explain Your Emotions. You won't die for professing your love. You won't disappear if you share your fear. Suck it up. Open up your heart for Pete's sake. What are you getting from holding back? Scratch all that macho shit and show your emotions. If all you want is hot sweaty sloppy sex let her know. If you want a relationship, say that. If she aint smash worthy, tell her. The most important thing is to be honest. 

3. Notice the Little Things. If she changed her hair color say something. If she cut new layers into her hair, compliment her. Notice her nail color, new highlights, new jewelry and new outfits. If she made a drastic change, don't make her feel bad. Trust me when I say she's doing 80% of it to appease you. The least you can do is tell her you noticed. 

4. Do Something Domestic. Too many men see domesticity as a drawback. They're hustling ass backwards. Do you UNDERSTAND how much poon you could get if you made a woman a delicious home cooked meal? Wash her car, clean the carpet and/or wash the dishes. Make her load a little lighter but don't brag about it. I'm willing to bet she would be much more willing to buss it open if you cleaned the house and did the laundry. "I appreciate that thing you did" sex comes second only to make-up sex. Thank me later. 


5. Stop Sending Mixed Signals. Seriously, stop this shit. Men send mixed signals and cause us to go off of the deep end then wanna call us crazy. You know what you did to make her act the way she's acting. You claim you don't want a relationship but you keep piping her down knowing she wants a relationship with you. Mixed signals #likeamug. We need you to reinforce your boundaries. If you don't want a relationship don't do relationship shit. Keep it strictly dickly. Don't cuddle. Don't buy gifts. Don't meet her moms. I hear you saying women should be able to tolerate a man being a gentlemen. People in hell should get ice water. Fact is most women can't handle it. We won't admit so I'm saying it for us. She is going to keep having sex with you because not having sex with you will let you know she can't handle a fck buddy. Be an asshole. Be straightforward. Send crystal clear signs. I'm serious. Make your boundaries clear so there is no room for signals to get crossed. Don't try to have sex out of spite, just move on. She WILL test you. For you she WILL break rules she claimed were set in stone. You have to hold yourself accountable for the things you allow. 

6. Go Shopping And ENJOY Her Company. We know you dread shopping. We know you dread seeing us nitpick over dresses. Look at it this way: If you can get in the dressing room with her you might get a free strip tease. See? Now its win-win! 
Do all of this AND open the top off of our pickle jar and we'll love you long time! 


I know there are a few things I missed. Ladies, what are some of the things men do that you wish women could do? Men, is there anything women do that you wish you could do?

OPPOSITE DAY: 3 things MEN do that WOMEN should START doing

Nobody told me today was Opposite Day! 

Over the past two years, single black women have been under fire.  I have to admit, I'm sick of it. People like Steve Harvey tell us to "Act like a lady but think like a man" and I think Mr. Harvey just might be on to something. His message may be a little "duh-worthy" but it is worth a second thought. While it is true that Mr. Harvey has been married thrice and divorced twice, the mere title of his book alone is something women should think about. We should all act like ladies but when dealing with men we should try to be cognizant of how they think. It is impossible to know what someone is thinking unless they tell you but if you are aware of the mindset of the person you're dealing with, it will benefit you.

Women could solve a lot of our relationship problems if we removed our emotions from the equation and thought about things from the male perspective. Women complicate things. Women are emotional. Women are nurturing. Unfortunately when dealing with men who are the opposite of this things can get complicated and misunderstood. Now that I think about it, I envy men and male friendships because they keep things so simple. I'm not the only one. Beyonce sang a song about what she would do if she were a boy. Ciara did the same. There are some things men do as a collective that women should start to do.

With that in mind, Talented Generation has declared today Opposite Day. How do we celebrate Opposite Day? By mastering some of the things men do to us.

Pull up a chair. Kiss the rang.

1. Flipping 101. Have you ever been in an argument and walked away disappointed in yourself? Have you ever asked him a question and you end up questioning yourself? Have you ever started a series of questions and before you know it he's giving you the 3rd degree? Wondering how this happened? *This* ladies and gentlemen is the result of “flipping the situation 101.” It is a talent many cheaters and "smooth operators" possess as a deflector from their f*ck ups. They turn the situation to play on your insecurities with below the belt comments that make you question your reasons for questioning them. Either way, you walk away from confrontations without answers and unable to shake your suspicions. Need an example? Belvedere is here to help. 
Scene: Guys phone vibrates at 1am. Girl is laying next to him in bed and is awakened by the vibrations.
Her: Who is that calling your phone at 1am?
Him: Thats nobody baby. I didn't answer because its a nobody. You're the only somebody that matters.
*soft kisses*<----FLIPPED!
Her: *Forgets about the phone calls and returns to dreamland*
Do you see what he did there? He made her forget all about the trifling heffa that disrespected her living space by calling at 1am. Nevermind the fact that he did not set boundaries for her so that she knows calling at 1am is unacceptable, he didn't bother to apologize. He didn't say anything about putting her in her place or telling her not to call at such an hour. He flipped the situation and instead of his lady getting upset, she was thrown off by a few sweet kisses and some sweet nothings.

If women could master flipping a situation 101, straddling, and crying at the drop of a hat, we could assume our rightful place as rulers of the free world. Inception.

2. Set boundaries and stick to them. In your first convo he says he doesnt like kissing. He says he's not romantic and he doesnt celebrate Valentine's Day. Women make the mistake of thinking we can change this. We can't. The truth is that he can be a Romeo and that he HAS celebrated Valentine's day every year but he has decided he doesnt want that type of relationship with you.  Men exercise their right to have reservations about what they are willing to do. What does this mean for women? When St. Valentine sends cupid our way on February 14 our gift basket is empty. Better yet, when he doesnt plan anything special on V-Day we dare not complain. Why? When we complain, he reminds us of the convo when he told us he didnt celebrate V-Day.  When her friends ask what she got she responds "we dont celebrate Valentine's Day."  Women need to do the same thing. If you dont spread em on the first date, tell him that and stick to your rules. Make your boundaries clear so there is no room for discussion or persuasion. If he doesn't want to respect you for your boundaries, have the strength to move on. Recognize that he WILL test you. Some women have a 90 day rule for sex but they end up breaking it by day 15. They end up mad at themselves for breaking their rule and realize their beau doesn't respect any other rules she tries to implement. He tests her every time she tries to set another boundary.  That is what happens when you fail to stick to your guns. Set your boundaries and stick to them. If he doesnt respond accordingly strap up your combat boots and kick his a$$ to the curb.

3. Categorize people.We all put people into categories without thinking. We look at others to determine things like: male/female; black/white/brown/gray; attractive/unattractive/Jesus hates your parents; etc. I regret to admit men are better at this than women. Although we have mastered what it means to put men in the "friend" category, we have not mastered much else. Men place women in categories to determine how they will treat us. Men characterize us as heauxxs, smuts, real women and then theres the coveted "wifey material" label. If he has decided you are nothing more than a heauxx you will be treated as such. The same goes for the other labels.  If we developed more labels for men, we could save ourselves a lot more heart ache. In a perfect world, all men would respect all women, but we dont live in a perfect world. We live in a world filled with a lot of f*cked up people. Le sigh.

I know there are a few things I missed. Ladies, what are some of the things men do that you wish women could do? Men, is there anything women do that you wish you could do?