Music News: Beyonce Drops Vid for "Party (rmx)" ft. J.Cole

Let me just say that I was so happy to see this in my inbox. I've watched the video several times as I love the song! "Ya got the swag sauce, she drippin SWAGOO!"

CHECK IT:



Love the Solange and Kelly Roland cameos! Sorta wish she kept Andre 3stacks but whatevs.


Tidbits: This week Beyoncé also announced she will be releasing her "Live At Roseland" DVD exclusively at Walmart on November 21st and the "Live At Roseland: Elements of 4" deluxe edition available everywhere November 29th. The DVD features 26 live songs that brings the quaint setting turn stadium performances to your living room. The deluxe edition features the complete concert, in addition to bonus offstage footage, a 20-page booklet and a video anthology that includes seven videos from her latest album, "4".

Daily Inspiration

GREAT morning beautiful people! Happy Friday! Here is today's quote:

Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential. -Winston Churchill

Confession: A few days ago I found myself a little discouraged. I started to feel like my degrees and my intelligence weren't enough. Like I hadn't networked with enough people. Like I was weak. I started contemplating settling into a job I didn't want because I thought finding a job I truly love was a dream. Yea, I was trippin', HARD. Thats the part of post-grad life they don't tell you about. Thats the part people won't admit they experience. It donned on me that 1/2 the battle on the journey to reaching your personal goals is to remain motivated when things appear to be at a standstill. If you ever find yourself in a similar situation, muster up the strength to keep your momentum going. Also important is to tell someone how you're feeling. Don't allow that kind of stress to simmer inside of you. Stress can be seriously debilitating and its important to acknowledge that it exists and to work through its root causes. Continue to believe in yourself. Don't allow your surroundings to break you. Don't allow your spirit to be saddened. You have to find your inner strength and rely upon it to continue fighting for your dreams. When all else fails, you will succeed if you continue to push forward. Even when it appears the odds are stacked against you, brainstorm ways to get around them because quitting is unacceptable.

Today's Song Choice: Rihanna Cheers (Drink to That)

Do your happy dance in 5, 4, 3, 2...NOW!

Spread Love!

Sharing is Caring: Oprah's Lifeclass Lesson

Last evening I had the privilege to be awake when an episode of “Oprah’s Life Class” came on. Prior to watching the episode, I signed up for email alerts about the different lessons but never followed up by watching the episode or even reading the tips. That all changed as of 10pm on October 26. What was the lesson? I’m glad you asked. Take  a look for yourself.

When People Show You Who They Are, Believe Them

After a few relationships gone bad and more than one night waiting by the phone, Oprah learned the hard way that if a man shows you he's untrustworthy, believe him the first time. Watch Dr. Maya Angelou discuss this important life lesson with Oprah.

The lesson centered around a piece of advice the great African American poet Maya Angelou shared with Oprah: When people show you who they are believe them. Oprah amended this advice by adding that you should believe them the FIRST time. Angelou also told Oprah to believe when people TELL you who they are because they know themselves better than you. Hence, if someone tells you they are crazy believe them. If someone shows you they are crazy, believe them.


The lesson resonated with me because I sometimes find myself making exceptions for people for various reasons. I'm sure I'm not alone. I have, in my lifetime, allowed people to mistreat me and disrespect me while giving them a pass because they did so while they were angry, or frustrated, or drunk. This was also a reflection of the value I placed upon myself because I didn't internalize the idea that I deserve better. I dismissed their rude behavior in favor of giving them a second chance without regard for the damage it caused my own spirit. Having negative people around me was toxic. It was stressful and it was draining. I learned the hard way about how powerful it can be to have people around who nurture and help your spirit grow. Its important for you (and me) to be brave enough to eliminate people from our lives who are not the best for us. These people will SHOW you who they are and you have to be conscious enough to believe them. Don't make excuses for people who are ruthless. Don't make exceptions for people who are reckless. Don't give passes to people who are disrespectful. Don’t make exceptions because you see potential in them to become better. Don’t make exception because they are attractive and possess some of the characteristics you look for in a friend/mate. Believe them the first time. 


Recognize that if someone is not ADDING to your life, they are SUBTRACTING from it. 

Now if only I could reconcile this lesson with what to do when people claim to have “changed.” 


Your thoughts??

FOUND in Translation: Chick Logic 101

Women are confusing. We are so confusing, we don't even understand each other. The bottom line for women is that we are confused creatures ourselves. We are all so different in our attitudes, demeanors, sense of style and perception of beauty that we sometimes become our own worst enemy. We’re quicker to pass negative judgment on another woman than we are on a man. We destroy friendships in favor of shabby relationships. We make outfit choices not based on what we like but on what other women are likely to notice. We are complicated beings.  Mattafack, if you need woman advice, the last person you should ask is another woman. I am always astonished when I ask one of my male friends for advice on another male he hasn't spent more than an hour with and he can give me relevant advice. He might have only "dapped" the dude or gotten You can't do the same thing for women. Some of us are good at hiding our crazy so deeply no one will know until we end up on an episode of Snapped. 


Regardless of the woman you're dealing with, there are some universal female tenets every woman lives by. These tenets are referred to as "chick logic." Chick logic is the line of reasoning women use to justify their actions. It is employed in situations where no other explanation makes sense. It is a logic only demonstrated by women. 


Without further ado...here is Chick Logic: REVEALED

5. Why we LIE and say we're fine. Everyone has seen a distressed woman. Its not pretty. She's usually crying. Her hair is a mess. We try to hide our emotions because we don't think it can be solved just by talking. This is especially true when dealing with males because 1) they don't know what to do with a crying woman and 2) they will say whatever it takes to make us stop crying. Its not always a bad thing that we're crying. Sometimes we get so overwhelmed with our life's events that we just need to let out a good cry. We say we're fine because we don't want to be coddled or held or anything. We say we're fine because its what we're expected to say. Sometimes, we just need to shed a few tears and we feel better. We just need a few moments to acknowledge that things have gotten out of control before we regain control. Other times, we say we're fine when OBVIOUSLY we are the opposite of fine just to see how much you care. Everything is a TEST with some women. She may not be mature enough to have realistic conversations with you so she chooses to resort to childish antics and gauge your reaction. Hence, if you see her crying and she says she's fine and you walk away she's ready to delete you from her life. You can remind her how many times she said she's fine but that won't work. Sucks for you.


4. Why We Can't Handle Being FWB(friends with benefits). Ok thats a little extreme. We CAN handle FWB arrangements. What we can't handle is when they are prolonged. We can't handle when the guy is nice and charming to us. We can't handle it when he wants to spend time with us doing something other than the horizontal polka. We can't handle it when he sends mixed signals about our chances of eventually entering in a monogamous relationship. We can't handle this because we weren't bred to do this. We weren't created to be objectified. We weren't taught to have emotionless sex. When our parents told us about "the birds and the bees" they didn't mention that Steve might only want to be your f*ck buddy. We weren't prepped for it as much as men are. Not that there is anything wrong with having a FWB as it can be a beneficial experience for both parties involved. All I'm saying is, after a few months, women are bound to start "catching feelings" no matter how much she denies it.

3. Why We Are So Critical Of Other Women: Women are so critical of other women that is perplexes men. This is because men simply don’t care enough to critique another man. Case in point: I’m at a social function with my male friend and I notice a considerable amount of men wearing baggy button downs. Its clear they didn’t bother to get measured to find out their true size and that bothers me. I ask my male friend, “Hey what do you think about men wearing baggy dress shirts? Isn’t that counterproductive?” His response: “I really didn’t notice, I was too busy looking at all these fat assed women in tight cocktail dresses.” Touche my ninja. After we shared a healthy laugh at his response, I had to catch myself for criticizing the women in the room for wearing said cocktail dresses. I recognize that they wore it show off their figures in what biologists would call the "peacock dance" had we been in the animal kingdom. I also recognize that women do not just dress for men, women dress for other women. I said all that to say that I can only speak for myself for this topic. I'm critical of other women because I am critical of myself. I don't like it when other women are "unladylike." Sue me. I also don't like it when women show up to professional networking functions dressed inappropriately. Soooo, YES I am critical of women who violate my unwritten rules. I'm critical because I think we can all do better. Thats it. 

2. Why We Date "Bad Boys:" I could explain this by saying women are nurturing creatures and feeding you a bunch of BS you're too full to eat. But I'm not here for that. Its time for keeping it real to go RIGHT. First, you should know by "bad boy" I don't necessarily mean a man with a record. A "bad boy" is simply a BOY the age of a MAN who is not ready to grow up and maintain a committed and monogamous relationship with a woman who makes him want to become a better man. We (and by we, I mean educated women) go for the bad boy because he is different. He's a simple minded creature. His pipe laying abilities are at an expert level. His charisma is off the charts. His "swag" is unparalleled. These are the things that make us want to associate with him. The reason we stay is because every time we think about leaving to find someone else, we realize that we'll have to compromise on a few things. The men we go on dates with aren't as fun to be around. They are either too cocky or have confidence issues. They don't have nearly as much "swag" as our current guy and have ZERO charisma. When all else fails, just know we're dating him to piss off our fathers and older brothers. "Bad Boys" are fun and exciting until they break our heart. Until that dreaded time comes, give us a chance to enjoy the ride. Lit'rally. 

1. Why We Support Beyonce: Let me just say that I quasi-stan for Beyonce. How can you quasi Stan? Well its simple, I support her and I love her music BUT I don't have my Stan blinders on so much that I won't listen to illuminati rumors. *looks around suspiciously* I believe every urban woman relates to Beyonce in some way. Whether its because she took a man who was seemingly a "bad boy" and got him to commit, or her *cough* acting ability, or the lyrics in her songs Beyonce has elevated herself and her career on her way to becoming an icon. She managed to "upgrade," marry & procreate with a bad boy who once sold drugs and still wears baggy clothes and Tims. In accordance with the hyped fantasy many women have of finally turning a bad boy good, Beyonce shows us that this is still possible. She's now a shining example of a woman who appears to truly have it all-a successful career and a healthy family. 


Sometimes I think women are not meant to be understood. I think God meant for men to find that one woman he doesn’t mind spending a lifetime trying to understand. 


Does chick logic exist? Are women as crazy as the media and men think we are? Did I miss any chick logic tenets? I'm listening...

Daily Inspiration

GREAT morning everyone! I'm baaaaaaackkkkkkk!!! WHOA! Its been 21 days since I last wrote a REAL post on TG. I'm thankful to those who continued to check in. I appreciate your loyalty. Consider it a mental hiatus =). Here is today's quote:

If you haven’t all the things you want,
be grateful for the things you don’t have 

that you wouldn’t want. -Unknown

Growing up, whenever I complained my parents always made a point to remind me that things could get worse. Oh to only have to worry about a broken chain on my bicycle again. After a long day of doing nothing, I grabbed my remote (because who gets up to turn on their tv anymore?) and tuned in to a marathon of True Life on MTV. For those of you unfamiliar with the program, it is a documentary project during which MTV follows normal people around who are dealing with a given situation. For example, one episode I watched was called "True Life: I have Acne" and another was called "True Life: I'm an albino." Now I realize one of the reasons my parents always resorted to "stop complaining, there are people who have it way worse than you." I know one of the reasons was to get me to stop whining but I also know they wanted to be aware of the perils of others. While I was complaining about a broken chain on my bike, there was a child who was never blessed with a bike. While I was complaining about being out in the sun for too long, there was an albino child who could not play outside for more than 20 minutes without getting a severe sunburn.

My point is, take a look at your blessings before you start to complain about your struggles. I know its easier said than done but trust me, once you start to focus on your blessings you will change your life. I know you have a job you love yet but there are other positive things you can focus on to keep your momentum going. I know you're disappointed you didn't get your promotion but you have to continue working hard. I know you're heartbroken that your relationship didn't work out but be thankful to have had the opportunity. Take every experience and LEARN from it. Understand you were placed in that situation for a purpose. Take time to figure out what that purpose is and move on.

Remember, there is ALWAYS something to be thankful for!

This post is dedicated to the "Metro Bandits" (insider) *giggles*

Today's Song Choice: Erykah Badu-Didn't Cha Know

Spread Love!!

Funny to Me: Property Law According to Toddlers

So my youngest niece is a toddler now. She's walking and won't shut up talking and just an all around happy baby. I find myself wondering what goes on in the minds of babies and toddlers and then the innanets answered that question for me. See for yourself...


Toddler Property Laws 

1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my hand, Its mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, It's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
6. If I am doing or building something,all the pieces are mine.
7. If it looks like mine, it is mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it     automatically becomes mine.
10. If it's broken, it's yours. 


Gotta love the kiddies :)

VIDEO: Fox News Reporter Gets SERVED during "Occupy WallStreet" Protests

This video makes me smile. Oh how I love Fox news *sarcasm*

You Sent it! "The Sing Off"'s Afro Blue

For those of you who don't know (don't feel bad I just discovered this yesterday), Afro Blue is one of the prominent groups from the hit NBC tv show The Sing Off. From the sounds of things, these talented folks are on their way! Take a listen...



HU!!

Thanks for sharing J Confidential!

Morning Inspiration

GREAT morning beautiful ladies and handsome gentlemen! Happy HUMP day! We're mid-way through this week and its time to get a little motivation in your system with today's quote:

“Life is all about timing... the unreachable becomes reachable, the unavailable become available, the unattainable... attainable. Have the patience, wait it out. It's all about timing.” -Stacey Charter

Have you ever wanted something so badly you thought you would DIE if you didn't get it? I don't mean lit'rally die, but figuratively. Like you would figuratively die a little inside if you didn't get it. Maybe it was the job you think is perfect. Maybe its the man or woman you think you ought to marry. Maybe its the friendship or network you wanted so eagerly to build. Then, it doesn't work out and you feel a little piece of you slip away. Before you allow yourself to feel that sinking feeling, step back and remind yourself that LIFE is all about timing. On second that, allow yourself to feel that sinking feeling. Relish in it so that you understand what it is like to not get what you want. Allow it to humble you and force you to re-evaluate yourself. That person you thought was so perfect for you but wasn't ready to be in a relationship? Its  not their time. That job you thought you would be the perfect fit for? Its not the perfect time for that either. Develop a level of patience that allows you to wait for when the time is right without always forcing things prematurely. You should continue to give things your all, but if they don't work out remember the 3 forms of time: HIS time, HER time and GOD's time. You wanted thing to work on HIS time or HER time without regard for God's time. Understand that if God has decided it is time for you to receive a blessing, no man or woman can close that door. On the flip side, if you make the mistake of living on HIS or HER time by believing you can FORCE the timing if it is not yet right you are only setting yourself up to be disappointed. Wait on God's time. If you don't believe in God, thats fine too. Although, I'm not sure what the equivalent would be. I guess you should wait on karma's time(??).  Today's Song Choice: Mary J. Blige-25/8 Spread Love!

Morning Inspiration

GREAT morning beautiful people. I hope you all enjoyed your weekend. Here is today's quote:

“Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit. -Conrad Hilton

No matter what you may be going through or just coming out of, remember there is a purpose for everything. Take a step back and get an honest assessment of what you learned that you may not have known before. Every experience is an opportunity to learn more: about life, about yourself, about other people. If you lost your cool, lost a loved one or even lost hope don't allow that to be the dominating factor of the situation. For every bad thing you have experienced, find something positive. If you lost your cool, take it as an experience that allowed you to discover new things that make you angry. As a human, you are allowed to make mistakes. As a professional, you should expect to learn from your shortcomings and work through them. Failure is not an option. Quitting is not an option. You have to keep pushing if you want to see true progress.


Today's Song Choice: Anthony David 4Evermore feat Alegebra & Phonte

Spread Love!!